This Cookie Monster Has Gone out of Control
There is a slight possibility that our bulldog, Wonderbutt, ate a Girl Scout.* So far, no one has reported that there is one missing, but the evidence in Wonderbutt’s Poop Pen is quite damning. Yes, he could have just taken one of the boxes of cookies off of our counter, and devoured half of it outside. But there is no way that fat little dog can reach the center of the counter where the boxes have been sitting. He can’t even get enough altitude to jump onto his favorite armchair at night. It is far more likely that: a persistent Girl Scout came to our door while we weren’t home, rang the doorbell twenty times, decided to make sure we really were not home by checking out the back of our house, climbed over the fence, saw the dog door, and decided to crawl through and deposit ten boxes on our counter along with a big fat bill. Before she could unload her Savannah Smiles onto our counter, Wonderbutt charged her, and gobbled her whole. Still hungry (because she must have been a fairly small Girl Scout to fit through his dog door), Wonderbutt then proceeded to polish off the boxes of cookies that had fallen to the floor, only stopping when he heard us arriving home. Then, he dragged the remains of the box to his Poop Pen to leave as a warning for any other adventurous, yet ill-fated, Girl Scout who might attempt to darken his dog door.
I just hope they don’t make us pay for all the cookies he ate.
*By reading this post, you have committed yourself to be my lawyer, thus ensuring your confidentiality in this matter. Or you can be my therapist; you pick.
I guess he could have climbed the stool – but how likely is that?
Posted on February 16, 2013, in Dogs, Humor, Wonderbutt and tagged bulldog, cookies, dogs, Girl Scouts, humor, I hope this is the last post I ever have to write about cookies, pets, wonderbutt. Bookmark the permalink. 32 Comments.
Wonderbutt, you’re doing great at those counter surfing lessons I’ve been giving you. But those girl scouts – you’re just supposed to lick them, not eat them.
I think he was so overcome by the scent of those delicious cookies he just couldn’t control himself.
I love your dog.
Do you want him? JK, of course. I love him, too!
Maybe you should offer a Wonderbutt badge to your local troop in restitution.
That is truly a fabulous idea!
so, he feels the same way about girl scouts as i do. i love the cookies – i would attack the actual girl scouts if i had a chance for tempting me at every corner.
I think he’s an equal opportunity eater; anything within his reach is fair game. Hopefully, as long as I keep feeding him, I’m safe.
I didn’t go to law school, but I have had a lot of therapy
You’re hired!
Naughty boy, Wonderbutt! Poor little girl scout….. I wish a girl scout would come to my house….. *sigh*
Love and licks,
Cupcake
I will inform Wonderbutt to forward the next Girl Scout to you
Do girl scouts taste like chocolate…?
The Micro-Dermabrasion paste tasted better.
Could I be Wonderbutt’s therapist?
Denmother
Yes, but I wouldn’t let him on your couch. He would just eat the cushions.
Ohh, I wish a Girl Scout would come to MY door! Don’t eat them all, Wonderbutt!
I told him that, due to his diet, he is restricted to one a week.
Hummm , did you smell his breath?
Unfortunately, I am often subjected to smelling his breath. I have to admit that it did smell suspiciously Thin Minty-fresh the evening of the incident.
I think he hasn’t let you in on all of his tricks yet. But that Girl Scout theory is a damn good one.
I am the Sherlock Holmes of the 21st century with my sharp wits and brilliant deductions.
I think that I will be your therapist…there must be many more wonderful stories about WB as yet unheard…..Eating Girl Scouts is not on his diet and will only makes him cuddlier…I am surprised that he did not get indigestion
It’s possible he did get indigestion. It’s a little difficult to tell, since he is always burping and passing gas anyway.
I think the scenario you paint is the most likely explanation. Although there could have been a very mild earthquake centered right at the faultline on your countertop that shook that box to the flow. Wonderbutt would then take that box outside because he knows what a problem winter ants can be. What a hero.
:”floor’ not “flow”of course. My fingers are stupider than my brain.
Oh wow. I did not take the earthquake theory into account. I may have recalculate this whole explanation.
You could write a book solely about Wonder Butt
I actually have a series in mind
Can we blame WB for eating the Girl Scouts cookies? They are so good- especially those Samoas. I agree with the comment above me (Aja) you could write a whole series about WB.
We once had two dogs that reached things we thought impossible. We would swear that they climbed on each other for a boost up. Where is a nanny cam when you need one? 8)
Wonder Butt’s amazing tales, i’ll be your publisher gimme a call, and if i had to chose i would say lawyer