Spoiler Alert: One of These MIGHT Be Your Christmas Gift This Year

As the holiday season approaches, I start looking at one of my browser bookmark folders in which I save gift ideas throughout the year.  To some of you, this may sound like an extraordinarily organized and proactive way to handle shopping for presents.  In reality, though, it’s like some kind of cryptic diary that my psychiatrist would probably love to get his hands on.  The problem is that I indiscriminately bookmark items of interest to that folder.  It’s possible that I thought of someone when I saved each one, but I don’t actually label them with anyone’s names.  Some of them are gift ideas for me.  Some of them might be good for hostess gifts.  And some of them would be better off never invented.

For example, could someone please tell me why I felt the need to bookmark the Star Wars sunshade?

Star Wars Sunshade

picture from Amazon.com

My husband loves Star Wars, but I’m pretty sure this gift would quickly find its way to File 13 if I chose to stuff it in his stocking.

And which of my beloved family and friends was I planning to bestow this lovely gift on?  It’s an alarm clock that sends your own money to your most hated charity every time you hit “Snooze.”

Could someone please tell me exactly what was I drinking when I saw this Golf Drinking Game, and thought it would surely make a great gift for someone some day?

picture from: http://www.thinkgeek.com/stuff/41/snuznluz.shtml?cpg=cj&ref=&CJURL=&CJID=2617611

picture from: www.outblush.com

I have about 100 products that I’ve saved in this folder since January – and about 2.75 of them make viable gifts.

So, the question is, which will offend people more?  Receiving a Star Wars car sunshade, or getting a polite phone call from me requesting that we put our relationship on hold until after the holidays?

I guess I just need to consult Dr. Freud’s Therapy Ball.

Can someone send me one for Christmas?

picture from:  http://www.amazon.com/Accoutrements-11742-Freuds-Therapy-Ball/dp/B000R820QC/ref=pd_sim_hi_3

picture from: http://www.amazon.com

 

 

 

 

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Posted on November 17, 2013, in Humor and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 34 Comments.

  1. I have no answers but you made me laugh…

  2. The wife also started the annual listmaking this weekend and perused two years’ worth of craft magazines looking for gift ideas. I kinda get why some people go away for the holidays and don’t give anyone presents. It’s so much simpler.

    That Star Wars sunshade looks nice, by the way. I wonder if my brother-in-law’s a fan…

  3. Thanks for the much needed laugh!

  4. I loved the alarm clock that donates money every time you hit the snooze button :)

  5. Tee hee. I do the same thing. Actually, that golf drinking game looks like good fun for Christmas day, even if never used again. You can add my name to that one :)

  6. Is it wrong that I like the golf drinking game? That looks like fun!!

  7. Hey, don’t knock Dr. Freud’s Therapy Ball. It’s one of the most anticipated events of the year!

    • Clever! Can you imagine the angst that prospective attendees would suffer beforehand? What am I going to wear? Why didn’t my parents ever teach me proper ball etiquette? What if terrorists set off a bomb?

      I could go on and on…

  8. Those things all exist? My first thought with the golf drinking game was whether or not it’d be more fun to watch than beer pong.

  9. Ha! My husband does the same thing! Oh well, mark me down for a sunshade!

  10. Are you kidding me?!? The Star Wars sunshade is fabulous! I must go and search that one out for Hubby. But I’d truly need help if I had to squeeze Dr. Freud’s ball every time I got stressed. I presume they sell them in pairs…? Or is that too Freudian?

  11. Maybe you were looking not for regular Christmas gifts, but for White Elephant gifts! These would be great for that!

  12. Maybe it’s not you. Maybe these are the perfect gifts. Maybe you just need new friends. And a new family…

  13. This is awesome! I personally think I may need the donation alarm clock. I may not hit snooze 4-5 times a morning! ;)

  14. you’re so thoughtful. I guess? ;)

  15. These are TOO good. Ha! Proof that you and I could be the same person: I’ve never bookmarked potential gifts throughout the year, but if I ever did, I am CERTAIN I’d drunk-bookmark all the time, and have a very similar list.

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