Some People Take Cereal a Bit Too Cerealously

So, I’m just going to come out and say this.

I HATED Cheerios when I was a kid.  HATED THEM.

To this day, I cannot understand the appeal of Cheerios.  They taste like round paper to me.  And, yet, every toddler in the world seems to love them.  So, I guess what I’m trying to say is that my unique-ness was obvious at an early age.

I did like Froot Loops, though.  I mean, what’s not to like?  They’re colorful, they taste like mini sugar cookies minus the cookie part, and they have a wonderful toucan named Sam touting their product.

Now people are all up in arms because it’s been revealed that Froot Loops has been bamboozling us this whole time.  Shockingly, we have learned that just because the loops are different colors doesn’t mean they are different flavors.  In fact, they are all the same flavor.

Gasp.

So, all of the people – and I am not one of them – who always used to separate their loops by color because they didn’t like certain flavors are feeling betrayed.  They are probably the same people who liked Cheerios.  Obviously they have disabled taste buds.

I don’t really care if Froot Loops are all the same flavor.  It’s not like they’re M&M’s, for crying out loud.  M&M’s are obviously different flavors – and it’s no secret that the blue ones are the best.

I learned a long time ago, when I dug to the bottom of a box for my prize and found a stupid coupon instead, that the cereal business is full of smoke and mirrors.  Nothing surprises me any more when it comes to breakfast food that you pour into a bowl.

But don’t. mess. with. my. candy.

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Posted on January 26, 2014, in Humor and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 20 Comments.

  1. Are you serious about the same flavor thing? I’ve liked red best for a while now. What the hell is wrong with the world? Out of all the things to screw people out of, multiple flavors shouldn’t be one of them. This is the most unsettling thing I’ve read all year. I need a drink…

  2. You’ve got it right, all right: Cheerios, yuck – and all Fruit Loops are the flavor of sugar.

  3. I hated Cheerios. Unless they were the mini frosted kind. Then they were good, but I don’t understand the cardboard circles. Froot Loops though… I loved those. When I saw that article my immediate reaction was, “yeah, I figured that out when I was five with my seven year old cousin.” She told me the red ones tasted like strawberries, the blue ones like blueberries and so on and I was like, “nuh-uh!” and proved her wrong!

    Now I’m wondering why 5 year old me didn’t care that they weren’t different flavors…

  4. Blue. Are you serious? Was that a typo? GREEN ones are the best. No question.

  5. We don’t get Froot Loops over here anymore. It was a very upsetting discovery.

  6. I DIDN’T KNOW THIS! But you know what? I’m not surprised either. Meh. Fruit Loops. The real question is, how do you feel about Honey Nut Cheerios? Because, IMHO, those are a dream.

  7. Cheerios totally suck compared to Fruitloops!

  8. You liked fruit loops – who would have guessed ;0P

  9. here it thought I was the only cheerio hater. i ate them solely to fit in. I was happy when honey nut and apple flavored came out because then being socially acceptable was actually palatable. oh and let’s not forget the recent advent of strawberry/chocolate. I actually LIKED those and so did my kids. until I told them that it would probably be cheaper and healthier to just buy strawberries and did them in chocolate with a side of cardboard.

  10. Oh dear….no cold cereals in my house growing up. It was either fried eggs or cooked Farina. You couldn’t change the flavor of either one.

  11. M&M’s are not…..oh, why start a tussle no one will win? However, I will say this in defense of Cheerios: Honey Nut.

  12. Too funny! I’ve been meaning to blog about fruit loops for a while! I’ll link back to yours when I finally get a round tuit.

  13. Gah! I hope this doesn’t extend to Marshmallow Peeps. I eat the yellow ones and throw the pink and white ones away.

  14. They’re all the same?!?! So when 4-year-old Audrey spooned out each color of Froot Loop one at a time and ate them separately it was all for naught? Yes, I was a slightly OCD child…. That’s not the point here. And they better not have messed up M&Ms!

  15. I still love Cheerios. And Froot Loops and Lucky Charms and Frosted Flakes. I just love cereal. I don’t eat it much though as I’m really trying to not keep swelling up like a balloon. A cereal filled balloon.

    When I was a kid, I loved Pink Panther Flakes. Which were exactly the same as Frosted Flakes..but they turned your milk pink. What’s not to freaking love?

  16. Green Ms are the best.
    Seriously, do we have to get Childrens Services involved to save Dimples?

    One of the nice things about being an adult with no kids is being able to buy sugary cereal with no one to judge, or learn from a bad example.
    (I have apple Jacks and Cinnamon Life in the closet.)

  17. They never fooled me. I always knew they were the same flavor.

  18. you are awesome, by the way!

  19. Did I ever tell you about how EVERYONE asked me when Cal wasn’t eating, “have you tried Cheerios”? And he actually will eat just about anything now but still does not care for Cheerios!

    Did Dimples eat Cheerios as a toddler? ;)

  20. “Disabled tastebuds”! HA!!! Love it.

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