September’s Dead Rubber Post by the BOF

I roll  my eyes as Dimples laughs hysterically in the back seat of the car.  She is cracking herself up by making farting sounds with her swim cap.  Another of her many talents revealed.

Her eyes meet mine in the rearview mirror.  She pauses.  “You’re going to put this in your blog, aren’t you?” she asks.

Confounded psychic prodigy.  How does she know what I’m thinking?

I’m a little concerned that we are starting to live to the blog.

Teachers (some) teach to the test.  Bloggers (and their families) live to the blog.

Crash has started texting pictures to me with the suggestion that they be included in the blog.  Dimples is making farting sounds in the hopes of becoming blog-worthy.  And I am mentally narrating blog posts in my head even as I do the most mundane activities.  I can’t wait to regale the Blogosphere with the story of cleaning out my purse.

One sign that I am hopelessly obsessed with blog topics is my feeling of disappointment when I arrive home and Wonderbutt has not wreaked new havoc during my absence.  Now what am I supposed to write about?

Cap’n Firepants is conspicuously trying NOT to be included in the blog. Well aware that excellent behavior makes for a very boring post, he has been the model of a perfect husband for the last week.  Guess I’m just gonna have to start making stuff up.  He doesn’t read it anyway.

Since I kind of want to keep our lives authentic (for the time being, at least),  I’ve decided to give myself permission once a month to publish a not so engaging post.  I’m kind of setting myself up for the rest of the month by doing it on the first day, but I’m getting a little desperate.  The upside is that you can’t point out all of the other unplanned boring posts from this month because I haven’t done any.

I’m calling it “Dead Rubber” because that is slang for boring, according to the online slang dictionary.

And BOF is Boring Old Fart.  So, I have completed my little circle by beginning and ending with the same topic.  Bathroom humor.  The lazy comedian’s guarantee to make someone grudgingly smile.  Yay me!

Just in case this post puts you off, I want to leave you in a little suspense by saying that tomorrow I’m going to make a Big Announcement in my post.  And I promise it has nothing to do with passing gas.

 

 

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Posted on September 1, 2011, in Blogging, Children, Dimples, Dogs, Humor, Wonderbutt and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 14 Comments.

  1. Haha! I totally know what you mean! Whenever something crazy happens, I’m like, “Well, at least this’ll make a good story for the ol’ blog!” I love it 🙂

  2. Yeah, when I’m totally into my job and not thinking ‘blog,’ I sometimes clean up a perfectly good mess before I get a photo of it for the blog. But that doesn’t often happen as I’m usually in a blog head.

  3. This is so true, probably of so many of us. I celebrate in my mind when something happens, or occurs to me, that might make a fun blog topic for sure. Hilarious that the kids are aware. Do they read it?

  4. You are now a true blogger! Ooh, a big announcement…

  5. ooooh How exciting….it is like an early Christmas..what can it be I wonder.

    Yours will be the first one that I open tomorrow..I cannot bear the suspense.

    Ho’w about a little clue?

  6. Well if it doesn’t have to do with passing gas…then I’M not reading it. 🙂 So, yeah your post reminds me of ME! This morning actually. Everything my son said seemed blog-worthy, so I wrote it down on paper so I wouldn’t forget. Sigh. It’s all I have for a post today so I’m going with it. But I feel your pain. Even my neighbors wonder why they aren’t mentioned in the blog more often. I guess I’ll have to think back to when I started my blog about a year and a half ago. I had all these stories in my head so I started the blog to write them down. Now I LOOK for the stories to write each day. It’s not the same. Maybe I’ll have to kick it old school for a bit and see if that helps! 🙂

    • I thought I was having problems remembering things before. Try using that as an excuse when you forget to pick up something vital at the store, “Sorry, Hon. I didn’t have room in my head to remember with all of my blog ideas swimming around.”

  7. I find myself doing the same thing. Sometimes I even talk through a potential blog post to gauge the reaction it will get. Sad.

  8. People are starting to realize that if they are within earshot of me (which really isn’t that far) then they are potential material. haha…

    My Mom responded to my most recent post by saying “I see that I’m going to have to be careful what I email to you or say to you b/c you might want to write about me again.”

    Everyone and everything is potential material. We just have to hope to be around when they are.

    Oh yeah, a fun site I use when I need to decipher what those young, whippersnappers are saying is http://www.urbandictionary.com/

    JWo

  1. Pingback: October’s Dead Rubber Post by the B even O’er F « whatimeant2say

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