What Ye Need is a Good Scabbard!

So yesterday, as many of you know, was Talk Like a Pirate Day.  Considering my husband is now known to all as Cap’n Firepants, I thought he, of all people would embrace this great holiday.  When I reminded him of it, he merely raised an eyebrow, and said, “Arrr.  Now, do you want me to go to the grocery store tonight?”

I’m pretty sure the last sentence was never spoken by an actual pirate.

The exchange made me a little curious about the origins of this day, so I looked it up, and there’s actually a whole website devoted to it, surprise, surprise.

The website was very informative.  I particularly enjoyed the pirate pickup lines, although “You. Pants off.  Now!!!!”  did not really seem to fit into the theme.  I do believe it would work with Cap’n Firepants, however.

Don’t ask me why, but that made me think of my favorite pirate (besides Cap’n Firepants, of course) – the Dread Pirate Roberts, AKA The Man in Black AKA Westley in The Princess Bride.

This led me to a website with Princess Bride quotes.  I spent fifteen minutes reading all of the quotes and chuckling about every scene in the movie.

When I realized how much time I’d just wasted reading practically the entire script of a movie I’ve watched a hundred times, I chastised myself strongly and got off the Internet.

But then I reminded myself we were still looking for a Halloween costume for Dimples and wouldn’t a costume from The Princess Bride be so cool?

Well, I got a little off track again.  I found pictures of a man dressed as Inigo Montoya at a Purim party.  Since I didn’t know what Purim was, much less why one would dress like Inigo Montoya for such a party, I had to research that.

Then I found a Fezzik costume for sale on eBay for only $300.  I think that Dimples, Cap’n Firepants and me could all fit in this costume at the same time.

 

This is beginning to be my worst attack of ADD ever.  Focus, focus, focus.  You are trying to type a blog.  Stop surfing the Internet, you fool.

Inigo Montoya: Hello there. Slow going?

Man in Black: Look, I don’t mean to be rude but this is not as easy as it looks, so I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t distract me.

Inigo Montoya: [apologetic] Sorry.

Man in Black: Thank you.

Yeah.  This isn’t going to work.

It’s time for me to go see what crawled out of the bung hole.

(Find out what I’m drinking with dinner, People!  You really need to get your minds out of the gutter, you land lubbing bilge rats!)

I’ve always wanted to say that.

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Posted on September 20, 2011, in Blogging, Cap'n Firepants, Humor, Relationships and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 19 Comments.

  1. I know what you mean. It just took me 3, count them, 3 hours to write a simple post. One search always leads to another. But I really hate that I missed out on celebrating Talk Like A Pirate Day. We used to have fun with that one at work. Great post.!

  2. great post but the last part is over my head lol

  3. You described how I “waste my time” perfectly! I’m so bummed I missed out on talk like a pirate day 😦 I must put this down in my day-timer and all the other calendars I have to remind me of things…

  4. I’m so sad that I didn’t know yesterday was “talk like a pirate day”. But thanks to your link, I’ll be prepared for next year. Aaaar!

    Love your blog – I’m picking up the RSS feed now!

  5. You’ve fallen victim to one of the classic blunders!!! The first is never to get involved in a land war in Asia! The second, and only slightly less well known, is never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line!!!

    My absolute favorite. I am not actually threatening you, although I am Sicilian.

  6. The bottom was over my head also! One of the dr told us it was pirates day! We thought he was insane! How come i am just hearing about this holiday? Maybe it will be a day off next year!

  7. Did you know you’re supposed to go to church on that day, too? 😉

  8. I find it almost impossible to stay focused when I’m online. There is just too much to READ and one link leads to another (someone once said you are only ever three clicks away from porn but that’s another story…lol).

    Anyway, I didn’t celebrate Pirate Day, I was too busy taking an exam yesterday but, if I did, I would have asked Capn Sparrow to help me celebrate it…drool….

  9. haha, i love that movie 🙂

  10. I LOVE the Princess Bride and wind up quoting lines from the movie all the time. My favorite… “I’m not a witch. I’m your wife!”

  11. Thanks again for my blog award nomination. I thanked you in a post as well so you can check it out on my blog if you want.

    http://www.heellisgoa.com

  12. Want to read a funny book about pirates? Pick up George MacDonald Fraser’s “The Pyrates”. You’ll be laughing out loud.

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