Why I Suddenly Feel So Perky

So, I promised I would not be depressed today.  Woohoo!  I am not.  I swear.  I’m just as happy as a Republican candidate during a debate with Rick Perry.

Would you like to know the secret to my sudden recovery?

How the Cap’n Deals with his Lovely Wife in a Funk:

He listens sympathetically to my declarations that there is no point to anything and I’m tired of trying so hard; then he asks what he can do.  I get irritated.

He gives me time to myself.

He cooks dinner.  (Well, he usually does that anyway.  I suck at cooking.)

He listens sympathetically again.  I get irritated again.  

He doesn’t say a word as I finish my dinner and leave the room to return to my Depression Chamber, the bedroom.

This is what is known as a Super Funk – the clutches from which Mrs. Cap’n Firepants does not easily escape.  Primarily because she does not even try.  

Cap’n Firepants realizes that it is time for desperate measures.  Two days of Funkitude are the max in our house.

In what can only be called an extreme act of reckless abandon, he releases the hounds.    Literally.  Removing the gate that separates the bedrooms from the front part of the house, he looses Wonderbutt and Mrs. P.I.B. into The Forbidden Section.  Cap’n Firepants is taking a big risk.  This could have two results – one of them easily being A VERY ANGRY MRS. CAP’N FIREPANTS.

Wonderbutt races down the long hall into my bedroom, entire rear end wagging (because he has no tail to speak of) and happily gives me a sponge bath with his tongue to let me know that a rare treat is occurring. After suitable affection is granted he proceeds to investigate all of the new things we have forgotten to put away in the hopes that an errant sock will be found.  

He eyes something dangling temptingly out of the hamper and yanks it.  Dimples laughs hysterically and Firepants’ blue eyes twinkle.  Mrs. P.I.B. forces her head under my hand as Wonderbutt proceeds to bolt down the hall, dragging my favorite Victoria’s Secret push-up bra behind him.

I can yell at everyone to get out and for Firepants to retrieve my bra.

Or, I can grab the camera.

Wanna Play Tug of War?

A Disaster to End all Disasters is averted.  The Funkitude disapparates.

Pardon me now as I try to find my bra.

What Bra?

Posted on November 10, 2011, in Cap'n Firepants, Depression, Dimples, Dogs, Humor, Mrs. P.I.B., Wonderbutt and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 30 Comments.

  1. Wonderbutt +Wonderbra = wonderful

  2. Hope you find your bra! Glad you have a good one who lets you be as mad as you wanna be. 🙂

  3. what a wonderful household you do have! Never a dull moment and so much love and fun..

  4. And this is why dogs are the best!

  5. Great post. I love the phrase “The Forbidden Section”. The little person’s bedroom and his toy room used to be my “Forbidden Section” but I am too big now to be stopped by anything but a locked door. Love the pictures – very funny!! 🙂

  6. writingandrecovering

    I love it. Dogs can almost always cheer someone up. Cats, too, but less often because they don’t care as much about their master’s happiness *glares at cat sleeping on opposite end of the couch*

  7. So happy to hear all is right in your world again.

  8. Caption: “I brought you a bra, but I eated it”

  9. Why don’t I think of these clever captions?

  10. I just got here so you have probably heard this a million times, but . . . Cap’n Firepants and Mrs. Cap’n Firepants and Wonderbutt. OMG. I laughed so hard I may have hurt myself.

  11. Wonderbutt is my hero. -Bongo

  12. Question, if Wonderbutt (bless his heart) stole your fabulous bra from Vicky C., wouldn’t your post explain why you’re suddenly *less* perky. I know it would for me.

    Glad you know you’re feeling a little bit better. I recommend a heavy dose of dark chocolate!

  13. The spot on Wonerbutt’s back is shaped like a dog bone! How cute!

  14. That could have gone either way. Kudos to you for grabbing the camera instead of yelling.

    Although I bet you were thinking you’d get a post out of it, right? 😉

  15. I wish I had dogs again. I can release the cats, but it just doesn’t have the same effect.

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