Reason #518 Why I Would Make a Bad Spy
My nine-year-old has a code name for the boy she likes – blanket27. She explained to me the significance of the word and number, but I forget her explanation. Instead, every time she says the code name, I immediately think of Linus from Peanuts standing in line to order pastrami at a deli. This mnemonic device does not really help me to remember who the code name actually represents, which exasperates Dimples. It’s her exasperation that finally reminds me – usually. Though it seems that she has been becoming more and more exasperated with me lately about things not related to blanket27 so we pretty much end most of our conversations wondering what the other person was talking about.
I try to encourage updates from Dimples about her social life without appearing too nosy – a tricky road to travel, as any parent knows. She acknowledged the other day that blanket27 had apparently confessed to one of her friends that he liked Dimples back. So I asked the next logical question, “Uh, so what happens now?”
“What do you mean?” she said. Completely deadpan.
Now back in my day (during Biblical times, of course) there was one more step after admitting the Mutual Like. “Going Together.” This basically meant that you would completely avoid each other all of the time – especially when you were in the same room – but everyone in the school would whisper that you were together. Every once in awhile, you might call each other. And, every Friday, you would skate together to “Keep on Loving You” by REO Speedwagon at Champs Roller Rink. I never once skated with anyone, if that tells you anything.
(BTW, if you want to get an eye-opening, X-rated definition of “couples skate,” try typing that into Google. Just remember, you can’t un-see it. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.)
I didn’t really want to explain the concept of Going Together to Dimples, because I had lived in another state back then, and things might be different here in Texas. And I didn’t want to give her or blanket27 any ideas.
According to Dimples, nothing happens now. Which is just fine with me.
I’m hoping that blanket27 will remain the code word for Dimples’ paramours even when she moves on. That way, I might figure out what she’s talking about by the time she’s 18. As far as I’m concerned, blanket27 can remain our secret word until the day she gets married. Then we can think of a new code name for her husband, so we can discuss him in mixed company. And this time, I will come up with the name. Because I will be completely senile by then, and I will need something easy to remember.
Adultdiaper123, do you take Dimples Firepants to be your lawfully wedded wife?
It has a certain ring to it.
Posted on December 29, 2011, in Children, Dimples, Family, Humor, Parenting, Relationships and tagged Champs, Dimples, Firepants, humor, I'm Going to Keep on Loving You, REO Speedwagon, roller-skating. Bookmark the permalink. 19 Comments.