I’m About to Jump Off the Cliffs of Insanity
Inigo Montoya: I donna suppose you could speed things up?
Man in Black: If you’re in such a hurry, you could lower a rope or a tree branch or find something useful to do.
Inigo Montoya: I could do that. I have some rope up here, but I do not think you would accept my help, since I am only waiting around to kill you.
Man in Black: That does put a damper on our relationship.
So, here is my new method to combat Writer’s Block. I have decided that when this dastardly disease descends upon me, I shall Google the quotes to one of my favorite movies, close my eyes, scroll the mouse up and down as fast as I can, click the mouse, and open my eyes to see which quote I have landed upon. I will base my post on that quote.
I don’t like this method.
What the heck am I supposed to do with this quote (from The Princess Bride, in case you are not an obsessed fan who has memorized every line)?
Am I supposed to pretend that it’s a metaphor for my relationship with my writing? Am I the Man in Black, and my writing is Inigo Montoya?
This is stupid.
Why would my writing be waiting around to kill me?
I mean, I could see how the metaphor works for my part. I am the strong Man in Black, climbing up the steep Cliffs of Insanity, determined to arrive at the top, no matter what obstacles get put in my way.
But why would my writing be out to get me? That would be an example of personification gone dramatically wrong, in my opinion.
O.K. Let’s dig a little deeper here. Inigo is trying to kill the Man in Black because he was ordered to by Fezzik.
Who would order my writing to destroy me?
Yeah. That doesn’t work.
Maybe, my writing does not want to destroy me; it is just eager to engage me in a test of swordsmanship – like Inigo was to show off his skills to the Man in Black.
So, my writing wants to challenge me to a duel.
Who am I kidding? I am no Man in Black.
I am a wimpy woman in sweatpants highly skilled in the roundhouse kick as practiced on my Tae Bo video – without making contact with any flesh. At least not on purpose. I did kick Cap’n Firepants once while doing my video, but that was an accident, I swear.
O.K. Let’s try switching this little metaphor around. I am Inigo Montoya, the man who is an expert swordsman, and just doesn’t have the one person he trained to kill in front of him.
The Man in Black is my writing, trying to reach me, but I am hesitant to drop the rope and make it easier.
Why the heck would I be hesitant to drop the rope?
If my writing is any character in this scene, it is the weaselly, long absent Fezzik, who has run away from The Man in Black, leaving Inigo to deal with the problem.
Yep. That’s my writing – a long-winded, egotistical, know-it-all – bullying and taunting everyone who crosses in front of his 4 foot 2, dumpy little, bald-headed body.
Ah, that felt good.
But I have a feeling my Writer’s Block might decided to stick around for awhile.Inigo Name Tag photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/rakka/2575763772/”>Rakka</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/”>cc</a> Inigo Montoya Barphoto credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/hanan_cohen/54800600/”>Hanan Cohen</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/2.0/”>cc</a>