How to Be the Best Mom Ever
I realized that I have been going about this summer thing all wrong when one of my daughter’s friends dropped by unexpectedly yesterday afternoon. She brought a gift. It is not Dimples’ birthday. From what I can tell, the only thing worth celebrating on June 29th (besides Katie Holmes filing for divorce) was in 2007 when the first Apple iPhone was released. But we don’t usually exchange presents to celebrate that auspicious occasion.
Friend: I brought you something from the beach at South Padre.
Dimples: Oh, thank you! (extensive hugging and thanking as Dimples pulls the tissue paper out of the bag; the gift is revealed to be a dolphin pen and a pink bracelet.)
Dimples: This is so awesome!
Friend: Yeah, I felt sorry for you since you said you aren’t going on any vacations this summer. So, I picked these out for you.
Dimples: You’re the best friend ever!
Within an hour, the bracelet had flown off of Dimples’ hand while she was playing Kinect, and fallen apart.
Then, Dimples fell apart.
In the meantime, I calculated the time I have spent taking Dimples to ice skating, friend’s birthday parties, swimming, frozen yogurt, the bookstore, and Dallas this summer. (Granted, part of the Dallas trip was to attend a funeral visitation, but we got ice cream there and ate in a pizza restaurant at a furniture store. In Dallas, I mean. Not at the funeral. Though, I think that I am going to add ice cream to my funeral flash mob extravaganza.)
I have promised to fix the bracelet. But, even if I do that (and I honestly don’t know how) and buy her ten dolphin pens, she will still look on this as her worst summer ever, and her friend will be a star.
I have an idea. I will go to South Padre next week – without her – and buy her a new bracelet.
That will work, I’m sure.