Who Died and Made You the King of the Parking Lot?

A few months ago, I wrote about one of my parking pet peeves – Backer Inners.  Now, I have a confession to make.

The reason that Backer Inners drive me crazy (no pun intended) is because I am a Wait Arounder.

I know.  You hate me.

I am one of those vultures people who drive through a parking lot, looking for cars that are about to pull out.  When I see people entering a car, I glide to a stop a few feet from their spot, and put on my turn signal to politely indicate that I plan to use that spot as soon as they vacate it.

One of my friends despises Wait Arounders.  She deliberately takes her time getting into her car, adjusting her mirror, checking her makeup, shaving her legs, etc…, until the Wait Arounder eventually gives up and goes hunting for another spot.

I am worried that one day, my friend will be in a parking lot and I will inadvertently Wait Around, not knowing that she is the person in the car, and it will become a Stubborn Test of Wills that will end up on the 6:00 news.

I may be a Wait Arounder, but I am a well-mannered Wait Arounder.  Unlike the one I encountered today.

Dimples and I left a restaurant, and got in our car.  I turned on the air, and then thought it might be good to check my iPad to see if her books had come in at the library so we could swing by to pick them up.

Honk.

I heard the honk, and looked around.  There were two cars parked pretty close to each side, but they were empty.  No one was behind me.

“What was that?” Dimples asked.  “Was that you?”  She likes to blame me for anything that irritates her.

“No.  I think someone was just locking their car.”

Honk.

Honk.  Honk.  HONKETY HONK HONK!

I looked a little bit farther.  A truck was waiting, and the driver was looking at me angrily.  He was a Wait Arounder.  And he was rudely insinuating that I was being rude by not Backering Out.

I thought about my friend, the Anti-Wait Arounder.  I knew what she would do.

Dimples looked at me expectantly.  I have been trying to teach her to be more assertive.

But the truck driver looked rather big and red-faced.  And possibly shotgun carrying.

I have also been trying to teach my daughter to stay alive.

I pulled out of the spot.

“Some people are so impatient,” I said to Dimples in a calm voice.  I turned up the radio.

And said some very not nice things under my breath about rude Wait Arounders.

That’ll teach him.

As soon as I perfect this parking method, I will not have to worry about Wait Arounders any more. I will also not have to wait around. I can stop hating myself. At least for that…
photo credit: https://www.sodahead.com

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Posted on July 17, 2012, in Dimples, Humor and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 25 Comments.

  1. OMG you are too funny.

  2. Yes – ditto to jmgoyder’s comment. I would add – in Australia it is a common requirement in many areas that one parks ‘tail to curb’ (we have LOTS of backer inners, Baby!) Second, I totally empathise about your rude waiter a-rounder experience. He needs to learn some manners.

  3. Your friend would hate me. I’m such a bad wait arounder that I actually choose where I want to park and then wait for someone to come out of the shops. I’m lucky that way – never takes more than a couple of minutes.

  4. I don’t like wait-arounders when I am stuck behind them. If someone is waiting for my spot, I’ll let them have it, but I don’t do myself an injury getting kids in car seats, etc. That’s what I hate. When I’m doing the best I can and a wait-arounder starts getting impatient.

  5. I take a long time backering out if there is a wait-arounder. But not out of excessive meanness (just the ordinary amount.) I take a long time becasue I have to be really really careful backering out when there is an audience.

  6. You just need to start toting your own shotgun now! 😉 That’s what I do, although when my road rages comes on it can get kind of scary on the highway… Maybe it’s not such a good idea.

  7. Thats funny!!

  8. You’re hilarious! You just can’t trust some people, though. People are scary.

  9. Yes, it sounds like you taught him a lesson – he won’t do that again 🙂

  10. I hate the wait-arounders, although they often seem to be technically “get-out-of-my-spotters.” I generally park at the far reaches of the universe, um, parking lot, so few parking lot vultures turn their beady eyes on me.

    I was stunned by the rudeness of the one waiting for you. Good call on getting out of his way before he got out the taser he saves for these situations, or the sledgehammer. Yikes!

  11. oh my gosh. there are too many things in this post that i love to name them all. suffice it to say that i am crying here at my laptop because this is so damn funny. and you have given me so many things to think about it. hubby hates it when i drive around and stalk people. he parks in NO MAN’S LAND (like a totally different parking lot than the one of the store to which we are actually GOING) so that no one will give him any sh*t about anything.

  12. My kindness to wait arounders depends on their level of rudeness.
    I have been known, in fact, to get back out of my car and stroll around if they are very rude.

  13. LOL…. each day is an adventure isnt it? Just keep writing and making us laugh! 🙂

  14. Ok, I would have never pegged you as a Wait Arounder! I hate the backer outers, too. They really think they are so cool.

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