Would You Still Love Me if I Was Bald?
A woman’s hopes are woven of sunbeams; a shadow annihilates them. George Eliot (1819 – 1880) English novelist
I have this absolutely wonderful blogging buddy at This Sydney Life who has decided to pass a baton to me. Let me tell you about the last time I was in a relay. I was in 5th grade, and I had never done a spot of running in my entire life. Apparently, the members of my team did something horrible in their past lives because they got stuck with me. I was the last runner. As soon as I got the baton, I burst out onto the scene. I was way ahead of everyone else. I could hear everyone cheering. By the time I was halfway around the track, I realized I was going to die. I’m pretty sure I didn’t make it to the finish line until the next day. But I can’t remember. Because oxygen could not get to my brain. And I don’t think it really has ever since.
Fortunately, this is a virtual baton that I’ve been given. And the relay is a Blog about Hope relay. When I first got this gig, I was a little worried. I haven’t had a lot of hope lately. I was going to cheat, and reblog a post I did about my dogs, and their amazing capacity to hope.
But then I ended up watching an infomercial, and realized that there is one thing that I am hopeful about – even though I have had absolutely no success in this area. Zilch. Nada. Null. Hair. I buy every single ding-dang-dong product that’s touted to give you beautiful hair. I follow my hair stylist’s directions. I watch videos. I STUDY the videos. Failure. Every time. Except for once, but then I failed in other ways, so that doesn’t count.
But I don’t care. As soon as I saw the ad for the Sarah Potempa Beachwaver Rotating Curling Iron, I knew that I must get it. I am absolutely, positively, without-a-doubt convinced that this is the solution to ALL of my hair styling problems. This curling iron CURLS ITSELF, PEOPLE! And, for those of you who are stupid like me, you can even tell it which side of your head it’s on by pressing a handy-dandy button, so it will CURL THE CORRECT WAY!
Hope? Of course I have Hope!!!! I even have a GOOD FEELING. THIS IS IT! My frizzy, fried head is going to to look fabulous in 6-10 working days. Just in time for school to start. Just in time for my new job at a new school with new people to impress with my lovely, beach-waved mane.
And, if, by some remote chance, I end up having to shave my head because I got a friggin’ appliance permanently entangled in my locks, then at least I will have the following quote to keep me from losing hope. It’s pretty much the only thing that keeps me going most days, to tell you the truth.
“A humorist tells himself every morning, ‘I hope it’s going to be a rough day.’ When things are going well, it’s much harder to make the right jokes.” Alan Coren (1938 – ____) British “writer, satirist” “In “”Quotations to Cheer You Up When the World is Getting You Down,”” by Allen Klein, 1991.”
(Oh gosh, I almost forgot. Now I must pass the baton to some other lucky people. I’m giving this to my top 4 commenters. Here ya go – Aja at Writing and Recovering, Julie at JMGoyder, Audrey at Dangerously Daydreaming, and Chuck at Collies of the Meadow. Go, my friends, and run like the wind!)