The Butt on the What?
So I was telling the rest of the Firepants family about a recent post by The Bloggess about “The Elf on the Shelf”. I cleaned up the language a bit for the sake of my daughter, Dimples. I said, “It’s weird. The same day one of my students told me all about how he had woken up to find out his elf on the shelf had gotten in the pantry and thrown flour all over the kitchen floor, The Bloggess wrote about the same exact phenomenon. And her reaction was the same as mine. “Who the heck wants to clean that up? Why would I deliberately mess up my own home in the name of a creepy pixie when I already have a family that does that for me?” (That was my reaction. Hers was slightly more colorful, but definitely in the same vein.)
Dimples then said, “You should do a post about that, Mom.”
And I said, “Well, that wouldn’t be very original since I just read about it on The Bloggess, and she pretty much said everything I would say – only about 433 times better.”
And Dimples thought for a moment.
“You could have a Wonderbutt on the Shelf,” she suggested.
Now this could never happen. Because Wonderbutt would break the shelf.
But it did get me thinking.
“You know, I think I could get parents to buy into that,” I said. “Listen to this, ‘Forget the imp that makes a mess; you need a Butt to ease your stress. All the old toys you want to throw out? You don’t need to scream and shout. Hide the Butt under their bed, and blame his appetite instead.'”
Actually, I just thought of that while I was typing. What I really said was, “What can we call him?”
And this is what we’ve come up with so far: Fool on the Stool, Messer on the Dresser, Destroyer in the Foyer, the Devourer in the Shower, the Puppy who Just Wants to Clean it Uppy, Jaws for a Cause (or Jaws for Claus), and the Evil Dog who Eats the Toys of Kids Who Don’t Listen to their Parents.
Personally, the last one is my favorite.
I’m thinking of putting it on Kickstarter. You know you want to invest…
Posted on December 5, 2012, in Children, Dimples, Dogs, Family, Humor, Wonderbutt and tagged Christmas, Elf on the Shelf, family, humor, life, random, The Bloggess, wonderbutt. Bookmark the permalink. 28 Comments.