One Man’s Trash Is Another Man’s Winning Entry in the Firepants Rummage Sale Contest

I don’t know how I came to be so fortunate, but our Tennessee Family Reunion happened to coincide with the exact dates of the The World’s Longest Yard Sale.

I. KNOW!

I mean, what are the odds?  Especially when I had no knowledge that such a sale existed?!!!!!!!

Here’s how we found out:  Once Cap’n Firepants and I stopped yelling at each other about where we should each go, we noticed an inordinate amount of traffic on our route to Chuckles Entertainment Center, and mentioned this to the man kind enough to take our money for our round of Bible Verse Miniature Golf.

“Oh, yeah, that happens every year when we have The World’s Longest Yard Sale,”  he said.

So, of course, I thought this was some kind of hyperbole.  But it turned out it wasn’t.  There really is such an event and we just happened to be smack, dab in the middle of it.  The sale, I kid you not, goes 690 miles from Michigan to Alabama.

And we almost missed it.

We almost missed the chance to buy 3 pairs of socks for $400!!!!

We nearly lost our opportunity to buy 3 pairs of socks for the bargain price of $400!!!!

I could not allow such a momentous event to take place under our noses without attending it, ourselves.  So, all Family Reunion plans were completely readjusted in order to make room in the schedule for a visit to The World’s Longest Yard Sale.  And, just to make things interesting, I threw down the gauntlet.

“We all put in a dollar, and whoever takes the picture of the tackiest, ugliest item at the sale wins the pool,” I challenged.

And so, folks, I give you some of the entries in the Firepants Rummage Sale Contest.  It is only some because some people (I won’t name any names, Crash, even though all you did the entire week of our Family Reunion was take pictures) did not send me an entry.

Now, we actually already determined a winner.  And it’s no coincidence that he happens to be the patriarch of this fine family;) But I’m going to let you decide who the rightful champion should be…

Entry #1 - the sexy dog costume that would be perfect for Wonderbutt to wear next Halloween

Entry #1 – the sexy dog costume that would be perfect for Wonderbutt to wear next Halloween

#2 - the baby doll who has no problem sticking its foot in its mouth

#2 – the baby doll who has no problem sticking its foot in its mouth

#3 - the evil clown from my nightmares who dismembered the baby doll in the previous picture

#3 – the evil clown from my nightmares who dismembered the baby doll in the previous picture

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Posted on August 14, 2013, in Cap'n Firepants, Crash, Family, Humor and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 17 Comments.

  1. You find ALL the best things. I guess you’re never coming down under, then…

  2. thanks so much for the Chuckle!!!! I noticed the count down has started. I f I hurry perhaps I’ll make it for 2014. Hope you left some stuff for next year’s sale. 🙂

  3. Thank you for the nightmares…the baby did it for me.

  4. That is one scary clown. ANd I thought that was a sexy baby costume at first. Either way, though…

  5. Wow you guys know how to have fun!

  6. I’m sorry but…bible verse miniature golf. We’d like to hear more about that.

  7. the $400 socks were scary, too. but, I had to vote for the clown. the baby is more “funny in a sad, pitiful way” (especially since I thought it was an actual ugly baby until I noticed the foot). and, for me and the bikini is well, just wrong. although WB could finally be sexy in it? my guess is he has no desire to be sexy, but who knows? do we all wanna be sexy?

  8. That clown is going to give me nightmares for a week! Yikes!

  9. The clown from Hades – eek! I’ll be having nightmares tonight, thanks. 😉 Maybe the t-shirt will give WB the illusion of a svelt beach body? ….or not…
    Have missed reading your posts!! Sounds like the family reunion was fun!

  10. Loved the post…hated the baby….could sell the clown in one of my flea market booths. 🙂

  11. The baby doll freaks me out!

  1. Pingback: I Don’t Know Why I Always Think of These Things When It’s Too Late. | whatimeant2say

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