I Think He’s Implying that I’m Shark Bait If I Don’t Give in Soon

Quick recap:  Our bulldog, Wonderbutt is on a diet.  He does not like the new food.  So, now he is texting me his displeasure.

 

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This is How Wonderbutt Negotiates

We have a bulldog.  His name is Wonderbutt.  He listens to public radio, reads and/or eats books, and recently switched to the unlimited texting plan.

Oh, and his farts are noxious.

And he doesn’t mean the kind used in American politics…

 

 

Some Seek Asylum While Others Should BE in an Asylum

Wonderbutt, my bulldog, has been listening to NPR too much today.  The Snowden case is freaking him out.

Wonderbutt – worried that his leaks have opened him up to prosecution.

Another Reason Not to Buy Your Bulldog an iPhone

Our bulldog, Wonderbutt, has been reading far too much lately.  I knew I shouldn’t have shown him how to follow Yahoo’s pet posts on the internet.

 

Sure – this dog fits in my lap. Whether I want him to or not.

Exactly How Many Calories are There in Styrofoam?

Our bulldog, Wonderbutt, seems a bit put out lately – possibly because we have been restricting his food intake the last couple of weeks.  Note that I said, “food intake”.  If you know anything about the history of Wonderbutt, you won’t be surprised to learn that his intake of everything but food has not decreased at all.  You can see from the widget on the left that he has miraculously made it almost a year without devouring our new living room furniture – but I’m not sure his self-control will last much longer.

It’s hard to explain to a dog why you are feeding him less, and that binging on beds with no nutritional value is not a healthy habit.

Wonderbutt’s bed, yet another one of our wise investments

Like I said, it’s hard to explain.

I am Thankful for My Favorite Anti-Depressant

Our bulldog, Wonderbutt, does not really understand the whole concept of our American Thanksgiving.

 

He seemed a bit miffed when I mentioned that he will not be feasting with the rest of us.

Despite his lack of social skills, I am thankful for Wonderbutt.  It’s ironic that a dog who looks so mournful all of the time can always put a smile on my face.

Happy Thanksgiving from the Firepants Family!

 

 

This Just In – Wonderbutt Chooses a Candidate

Our bulldog, Wonderbutt, did his research and carefully made his U.S. presidential election selection:

Wanted: A Trampoline with a Slingshot – and Maybe a Pig or Two

A new text from my deprived, overweight bulldog, Wonderbutt:

And the video that inspired me to consider the addition of a trampoline to his weight loss program:

At Least He Doesn’t Text and Drive

Wonderbutt telling me I better buckle up.

 

So, here are a few very recent texts from our bulldog, Wonderbutt:

I refuse to buy him the new iPhone.

He can have my old one.

Now, Where Did I Put My Gas Mask?

So, as usual, our house is a construction zone, and our bulldog, Wonderbutt, has to have his nose in everything.  Based on his text messages to me, his interpretation of things is a bit different than ours…

 

 

He acts all macho, but you should have seen him jump the first time the “new dog farted”! 😉