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Some People Take Cereal a Bit Too Cerealously

So, I’m just going to come out and say this.

I HATED Cheerios when I was a kid.  HATED THEM.

To this day, I cannot understand the appeal of Cheerios.  They taste like round paper to me.  And, yet, every toddler in the world seems to love them.  So, I guess what I’m trying to say is that my unique-ness was obvious at an early age.

I did like Froot Loops, though.  I mean, what’s not to like?  They’re colorful, they taste like mini sugar cookies minus the cookie part, and they have a wonderful toucan named Sam touting their product.

Now people are all up in arms because it’s been revealed that Froot Loops has been bamboozling us this whole time.  Shockingly, we have learned that just because the loops are different colors doesn’t mean they are different flavors.  In fact, they are all the same flavor.


So, all of the people – and I am not one of them – who always used to separate their loops by color because they didn’t like certain flavors are feeling betrayed.  They are probably the same people who liked Cheerios.  Obviously they have disabled taste buds.

I don’t really care if Froot Loops are all the same flavor.  It’s not like they’re M&M’s, for crying out loud.  M&M’s are obviously different flavors – and it’s no secret that the blue ones are the best.

I learned a long time ago, when I dug to the bottom of a box for my prize and found a stupid coupon instead, that the cereal business is full of smoke and mirrors.  Nothing surprises me any more when it comes to breakfast food that you pour into a bowl.

But don’t. mess. with. my. candy.

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