Forget the Milk. It Does a Number on My Sensitive Stomach.
In honor of See What Dangerous Items Your Dog Can Eat Without Needing to Be Taken to the Emergency Vet Clinic Month*, Wonderbutt has been making great strides in his clinical research.
The other night we discovered his “pad” looking like it had been invaded by a homeless (note the newspaper section) junkie afflicted with the munchies.
No one could attest to how many oreos had been in the package when it was left on the counter, and no one could figure out how Wonderbutt could get to the package on the counter, which is ten feet higher than the top of his head.
Dimples and I had noticed that evening that Wonderbutt seemed gassier than usual. He was kind enough to emphasize this by sitting between us with his bottom aimed at our faces and releasing a not-so-silent-but-just-as-deadly sample for us to sniff.
By the time we discovered the probable cause for his unstable stomach, it seemed ridiculous to call the vet to inquire about possible chocolate poisoning when we would be forced to declare excessive stinkiness as his only symptom.
In a related story, I was informed by my sister, Crash, that her dog had chosen the same day to ingest a Harry Potter DVD and portions of some scrapbooks. It’s obvious Wonderbutt texted orders to his cousin to get cracking on her contribution to this month’s research project or else be in danger of losing all funding.
I can’t wait until this month is over.
* October is National Bullying Prevention Month, National Breast Cancer Awareness Month (We don’t want to prevent Breast Cancer – just be aware of it this month, I guess), Clergy Appreciation Month, and Sarcastic Month. That’s just a sampling. Here’s more if you are really curious. There is apparently no one in charge of Month Declaring, so people can just willy nilly announce that any month is special for whatever reason. I officially declare November to be Worldwide Cut-Out-Trying-to-Monopolize-the-Calendar Month.
Posted on October 19, 2013, in Dogs, Humor, Wonderbutt and tagged bulldog, dogs, gas, humor, October, Oreos, pets, stomach, wonderbutt. Bookmark the permalink. 16 Comments.
I’m impressed with Wonderbutt’s ability to source chocolate above his line of sight. I may have some use for him down here. Do you think he’s like a holiday in Oz?
I think we would both enjoy it! Especially if chocolate is involved!
OMG your breast cancer comment. LOL!
I’m glad I’m more of a cat person. They don’t seem to ingest too many things they aren’t supposed to.
My very helpful aunt and uncle had a dog who has sadly passed on now from cancer, and her chemo made her gassy and stinky. We go there every Thanksgiving and that year we all had to shiver with the windows and doors open to get out the smell.
I think you just gave me a good reason not to host Thanksgiving this year!
Definitely time to start lacing his food with Bean-O.
Not sure it’s made for dogs, but I doubt that’s an issue for WB…
Does that stuff really work?
I have no idea, but it is stocked at reputable chain drug stores…
Cookies, mmmmm. You are my idol, WB. You don’t let your short legs stop you from stealing food. I believe you can fly!
Love and licks,
I guess if he can swim he can fly, right? Nothing is impossible for Wonderbutt.
I dunno…I’d go for the Oreos too…
We have four dogs but the littlest one… the chihuahua likes to eat everything he can and ends up dry retching in the middle of the night. I think i’d rather the silent but deadlies 🙂
What happen to his diet?! 😉
Interesting post. Why this concern about Wonderbutt’s ability to ingest what he has eaten? Could you be somehow seeing his situation from your own perspective?
We’ve had some interesting items consumed by the puggles this month too. I just wrote a post about one for later in the week.
My husband said to me earlier this month, “Are you missing some limes?” I stared at him blankly and asked him to repeat himself, even though I had heard him. Apparently he found three moldy limes under the couch. Our best guess is that Jack climbed on the table and pulled them out of the fruit bowl. He’s lured to the fruit because it smells like food, but once he gets it in his mouth, he thinks it’s a tennis ball. He’s done this with peaches too. Takes it into his cage to eat it and then just stares.
Who hasn’t done that to a box of Oreo’s, leave the kid alone.
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